Beautiful Crazy

I've lost all recognition of dates, days and times. This account is over the past 2 weeks, I think.

A Saturday. At 11am I drive A Girl Housemate and I to Manchester. I pick up another Girl Housemate there, then head to a friend's house to pick up tickets to Parklife then drive back in a huge cirlce to another of our friend's houses where we're staying that night.
We get there at 3pm and queue for about 35 minutes for the toilet and then 45 minutes for the bar. We find a space a fair bit in front of the main stage and listen to Calvin Harris' crappy DJ set. This causes me to drop a bomb of MDMA. I see a girl dancing on a pizza box, taking care not to fall. During a quiet part in a song I hear her chanting 'lava lava everywhere, don't fall in, there's lava lava everywhere.'
Hours pass and we meet up with a group of mates and watch Friendly Fires play, and I take a key of MCat. I catch the eye of a girl I went to college with as she's waving at me. I feel obliged to go over. Awkward chit-chat ensues and I quickly make my escape.
Minutes or hours later and I'm stood waiting for someone at the bar. Some boy comes over and asks for a cigarette. I let him roll one from my supplies. He talks and I listen.
We leave in the early hours and go back to the house and drink until about 5am.


I wake up at 11.30am and get breakfast cooked for me. I leave the house at 3pm with 2 Girl Housemates and my Sat Nav directing me to Sandbanks in Dorset. 6 hours later, thanks to a fucking crash on the motorway, we arrive. A 3 bedroom apartment 30 seconds walk away from the beach. Already there are 6 girls and 3 boys. We just watch t.v and catch up.
10.30am the next morning and one boy is smoking weed on the patio, so I get a cider and join him. 2 hours later we head to some landmark that apparently shows perfect erosion. I don't know, i'm not into Geography, but it looked good. We find a beach and A and I swim through an arch. On the way back around the current prevents us from being able to swim forward, I literally think my arms are going to detach. Feeling seaweed over my feet doesn't help matters so I summon one last burst of depleating energy and finally make it back to beach. I see a tall, tanned, dark-haired sex-god has arrived with what I presume is his girlfriend and another couple. I spend the next hour watching him lark about in the sea in tiny black trunk. This is a holiday.
Early evening, and I open my 70cl bottle of vodka. We have a couple of rounds of the name game; i'm Orson Wells and then Arnold Schwarzenegger. I wake up fully clothed in bed at 9.30am and can't remember the last part of the night. I'm surprisingly not hungover and head to the kitchen to see the remains of my vodka. There's no more than a shot left. I have a shower and sit outside in the sun reading Fierce People. At 11.30am I drink a pint of cider and get wasted. Ahh that's why I wasn't feeling hungover, I was still drunk, it's a state of being.
3 days later? With much more alcohol and food consumed I get in my car with 2 Girl Housemate's and head back to Leeds. We stay there for a night then drive to Manchester for a birthday.



It's a Friday night and we head to the village for a meal then onto a Northern Soul night. I become obsessed with watching 3 skinheads dancing like speed junkies dressed in Dr Martens and roll up skinny fit jeans and braces. We meet a 50-something called Francis who was a drummer in some Northern glam rock in the 80's. He ends up coming back to the place we're staying along with 6 or 7 other club kids where we drink and listen to Morrissey vinyls.
The next day we go to birthday girl's family home for a party. I listen to her uncle talk about his 6 months in prison for driving at 2 security guards. I listen to her mother tell me I'm the son she always wanted. I watch her aunt dance to The Smiths. I tell her boyfriend that he's doing really well for his first time meeting the family. We leave at 10pm and go to a 60's night. I get chatted to by some boy outside who asks for my number. I tell him I have a boyfriend. The night ends at some point and we go back to birthday girl's house.

It's Sunday, Father's day, and I get a bus into the centre of the city to meet my dad and his girfriend, and her mum, dad, brother, sister-in-law, and 2 nieces, and my sister and 3 year old half brother. We watch some parade and then get chinese food.
What's that? asks my brother, pointing to my shredded duck.
It's duck.
Like....quack duck?
Yeah, like in the park. Want some?
......no!
Messing up kids' heads is fun for me.

I get back to my family home in the early evening and spend the next 3 days eating strawberries and drink my mother's Moet as I watch tennis. Yesterday I went to J's and drank and watched the football. Now i'm back in Leeds.

My degree results have been up in University for a week but I'm not going in to get them until Monday because I want to have a fun weekend.

Thank god that is over. Back to regular tranmission.