Sunday, 30 January 2011

Why technology ruins everything.

I don't really like facebook, and on the rare occasions (once every 3 or 4 days is rare right?) I log on I usually don't post anything or reply to anyone.

But I was in some bar in some town on Friday night after having Mexican with J and Y and we had a pitcher each and C had text me telling me to look at the group message on facebook about our Ibiza holiday.
So I log onto facebook in the bar. Now if I saw someone on facebook in a bar i'd seriously question their social skills, but J and Y had gone out for a cigarette and I was left at a table alone with 3 pitchers and 3 glasses so I thought I should at least cut myself off from everyone else in the room instead of aimlessly staring at people.
I read the message.
I update my status; 'A pitcher and 1 glass please'
I check my news feed:
Simon has checked into bar. 13 minutes ago.
Oh fuck, see this ruins everything. He's in the same bar, I know he's in the same bar, I can't see him but he's here and I know it.

I panic, and then I reminisce, and then I panic again. I refresh facebook and my status has 2 likes and a comment; '*1 straw' so I comment 'yeah fuck the glass' and then realise I'm supposed to be panicking.
I tell Y and J when they come in and together we come up with a plan: do nothing.
I mean really what are my choices:
1) Check into the bar and he either doesn't see it and it makes no difference, or he sees it now 30 minutes after he checked in and thinks i'm completely stalking him.
2) Text him something all fuckery like 'Just seen you're in bar, me too ;)' and seem as equally creepy as choice 1.
3) Do nothing and secretly hope I run into him by taking frequent smoke/toilet breaks.

So I chose 3, but I never saw him and by 1.30am when I was heading home (work) I was drunk enough to text him 'just got on facebook at home and looks like we were in bar at the same time :)'
And he texts back 'Shush!' which I kind of liked because it's the sort of thing i'd say.
I didn't text him back.


Anonymous said...

No hug?

Joe Stone said...

You seriously need to quit drinking. It's clear from your posts that you're on a one-way track to alcoholism, and the complete life disaster that comes with that.

I wish you a better existence than brain cell destruction, cirrhosis, unemployment and an early death.

Lust For Life said...

Micky-a hug from whom?

Joe Stone-haha